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Remembering Ming Qu

Biao Yang talks about his best friend, Ming Qu, at the Ying Wu and Ming Qu Memorial celebration on April 18 at the Shrine Auditorium. English and Chinese versions follow:

Good evening, everyone. My name is Biao Yang. Ming Qu is my best friend. We have known each other for six years.

Ming Qu. It has been six years since we became good friends. I can still clearly remember the moment when I first saw you. You were wearing a silly sporty suit. You walked into the dorm and introduced yourself, “Hey guys, My name is Ming Qu.” Yes, that was how we started our college life.

We went to class together, we ate together and we hung out together. I found that we had so much in common and we became best buddies. You told us that you were born in the countryside. You did not know anything about soccer or basketball until middle school. You hoped that you were just like anyone of us who got the chance to learn a lot of stuff. I told you: “It’s OK. I can teach you!” Ming, do you know that you were really not that good at those sports? But it does not matter at all. What matters was that we were together. But now, it will never be like that again.

Last Wednesday, some police officers came to our home and told me the bad news. I kept asking myself how that could happen? I just could not believe it. They told me you were in the hospital. I know you must have felt lonely there. Do you know how bad I wish I could be there with you? But the only thing I could do was stay at home and hope that it was not true, and that you would come back. Just the day before, we cooked together; we went back home together. How could I accept the fact that you were gone forever? I hoped that it was a mistake.

When I saw the news online, I knew I had to accept the fact. I could not make myself believe what happened. I tried to convince myself that you just went to campus. You would come back and eat dinner with me, and you would talk about funny stories that happened during the day, like what we always did. I was waiting and expecting you at home the whole day. But you never came back. What could I do? I lost you. What could I do? You were gone. My best friend. My dear brother.

The past seven days seemed incredibly long to me. I missed you every moment with great pain and hold my precious memories of you. I remembered that you said you planned to study abroad in the United States after graduation when we were juniors in college. And I had the same plan as well. So we began to prepare for GRE together. We studied in the new building of Beijing Hangtian University until midnight; we borrowed chairs from the teachers’ room to continue study even after the classrooms were closed. However, I changed my plan due to some personal reasons. I remember that what we talked about most at that time was our future – we felt sad for our coming farewell, and we regretted the fact that we could not fight for our goals together.

After graduation, you came to the U.S. while I chose to stay at Beijing Hangtian University. However, our friendship never changed. I often told you about my wish to experience different cultures. And you always told me how great USC was – with strong academics and sophisticated facilities. You encouraged me to come and to fight for our goals before we went back to China. I told you I would definitely come. But the deadline of registration for the GRE test in mainland China had passed when I decided to enroll in the spring. You immediately decided to accompany me to the Philippines to take the test. You grew up in the cold Northeastern area of China and you were naturally sensitive to the hot weather. Although you passed out due to the extremely hot weather in Philippines, you never complained.

Later, I got admission to USC and told you before anyone else about the news. Even though we were hundreds of miles away from each other, we had the same excitement for my admission. I was worried that my hurried preparation would make it difficult for me to adjust to living and studying in the U.S. However, you told me not to worry too much since you were here. You said you were looking for a place for us to stay and had a car already, which would give me more chances to go around L.A. instead of staying on campus and not going anywhere.

You once asked what kind of room I wanted to live in; I said anywhere is OK. So you found a very cheap single room for us to share. You always said we should save money that was earned by our parents’ hard work. The place we lived was fine. However, your parents could not help crying when they saw the place we lived. They never expected their son would live in such a humble place, and they felt so sorry for you for not making enough money to better support your study and life here. You once said you wanted to find a job soon to buy your parents whatever they wanted since you never bought anything for them before. But sometimes, you felt it was so hard to find a job. I said you would be able to find a job here for sure based on you ability. But the murderer deprived your chance of living and realizing our future goals. Our future is infinite, but time stops, your young life and all you have were deprived cruelly.

Your parents are here now. You once told me your parents were the most important people in your heart. You chatted with your mother every two days, talking to her about those little things in life. You even asked me to video chat with your father. I could feel your deep love for your parents. Do not worry. We will take care of your parents.

We will complete your goals that you were not able to realize. Take care of yourself in heaven. I hope we could still be good friends in another life.

各位老师同学,大家好。我叫杨彪,我和瞿铭相识六年,他是我最好的朋友。

瞿铭,认识你六年了,最交心的就是你。我还清楚地记得,第一次见你的样子,你穿着一身傻傻的运动服,走进宿舍,说大家好,“我叫瞿铭”。大学最初的生活,大家一起去上课、去吃饭,聊得多了,我发现,原来我们有那么多的共同点,于是我们成为了形影不离、无话不说的好友。你和宿舍的兄弟说你小时候在农村长大,直到中学才知道什么是足球,什么是篮球,所以你一直没有对足球和篮球产生兴趣。你说你很羡慕别人,从小就接触了很多东西,不像你一样,足球篮球一点都不会。我说,没关系,你可以学啊,于是你和我们一起去踢球,你知道吗?其实你开始真的踢得很烂,可是没人在乎这个的,重要的是,咱们在一起。而现在,却是天人永别了。

4月11日早晨8点半,警察来到家里,告知我,在凌晨1点左右,你遭遇枪击,身亡。这怎么可能?!我无法相信。警察说你在医院,我多么想陪在你身边,你孤独地躺在医院里,还是在这陌生的国土,你是多么的寂寞?可是我去不了。我只能在家,固执地认为你还会回来。前一天还一起吃晚饭,一起回家的你,怎么可能就这么离我们而去?我希望一切都是误会,是警方弄错了。直到我看到网上的新闻,我才知道,这真的是真的。可是我不想相信,无法相信,怎么可能会是你?怎么可能!我不想哭,我根本就不认为这是真的。我宁愿相信,你只是去了学校,中午还会回来叫我一起吃饭,和我聊学校的趣事。我在家里等了一天,你没回来。我能做什么,面对你的离去,我能做什么!为你我还能做什么!我最好的朋友,像家人一样的兄弟。

过去的七天,对我来说漫长得无法想象。我无时无刻不在思念你,止不住的悲痛和回忆。大三的时候,你说要出国,我说我也有这个打算。于是我们开始准备GRE。那个学期我们每天一起在北航新主楼学到半夜;教室关门了,我们就在教师休息室搬凳子自习。后来我因为一些事搁置了出国的想法。那时,我们谈论最多的就是未来,我们为分离而难过,为不能一起奋斗而遗憾。大学毕业后,你来到了美国,我留在了北航读研。兄弟的情谊没变。我常跟你说想换个环境,见识下不同的文化。你也总跟我说,南加大教育水平有多高,教学设施有多先进。你劝我来,说我们在这里一起奋斗,闯荡个几年再回国。我对你说,我肯定会来的,你先去打头阵,我随后就到。后来我决定申请春季入学,可是那时已经国内GRE  报名已经截止。你二话没说就陪我去菲律宾考试。你生长在天寒地冻的东北,一直怕热,菲律宾的炎热让你几乎中暑,你从没吭过一声。再后来,我收到南加大录取通知,第一时间告诉了你,远隔万里我们激动的心情却是一样的。我说我准备得仓促,担心到美国什么都不懂,难以适应环境。你说放心,有你在呢,房子你正在找,车也有了,不会再像你刚来那样,待在学校附近哪儿都没去过。你问我们住什么样的地方合适,我说能住就行,于是你找了个便宜的单间我们两个一块住。你总说,父母的血汗钱,能省就省。其实我们两个都觉得我们住的地方很好了。周一你爸爸妈妈到家里来了,看到我们住的环境,失声痛哭,说没有想到自己的孩子住得这么差,遗憾自己没有多挣点钱。你说你一定要找到工作,从来没给爸爸妈妈买过什么,想早点挣钱孝敬他们。你又说找工作压力好大。我说你没问题的,以你的能力,肯定可以留下来。可是歹徒不给你这个机会。未来有无限可能,我们一起憧憬过的!时间却终止了,你的生命,你的一切就这样被残忍的剥夺。

你爸爸妈妈都来了。你跟我说过很多次,在你心中,父母永远是第一位的。你隔几天就和阿姨在网上视频聊天,唠家常,还拉着我和叔叔视频。我能感受到你对父母的爱。放心,叔叔阿姨我们来照顾,你未完成的心愿我们来达成。在天堂好好照顾自己,愿来生我们还是兄弟。

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